Life As We Know It

Holy crap! I AM an artist!

 

Finding my feet, art journal, 2012

I never dreamed of being an artist. I only ever wanted to be a mum.

Yet somehow earlier this year, my dreams changed. I realised I no longer wanted to be a mum who does art on the side, I wanted to be a mother AND an artist.

That may seem like a subtle change to you. But to me, it was huge. It would mean admitting publicly that I'm an artist. And that was scary as hell.

 

I needed a serious push.... And I got one.

 

It started innocently enough (for her anyway!) with Marie calling me a visual artist in a game of tag.

Little did she know her words sent me into emotional turmoil. That my whole life up to that point literally flashed before my eyes. That I bawled my eyes out.

All because she called me an artist.

The second time someone called me an artist, it went out to all my facebook friends, new and old. Someone from the wild art group tagged me as an artist when we became friends. I didn't realise it would change my profession on my timeline. When I did, I seriously thought I was going to be sick. The  palms of my hands were sweaty, my heart was beating ten to the dozen, and my head was pounding furiously to the tune of "ohmygod!ohmygod!ohmygod!".

I wasn't worried about my new friends finding out, they all do art too, so they understand. But my old ones...Oh boy, that was scary!

I felt naked. Vulnerable.

I half waited for them to say I was delusional, a fraud, that they remember how crap I was at drawing at school, that my new art isn't any good either, that I should stick to being a housewife because that's all I'm good at (which of course set off a whole lot of mama guilt for even daring to think of being anything other than a mother).

And I seriously I considered changing it back to SAHM. Safe old SAHM.

Instead, I sat with it. I gave the fears, the insecurities and inner critic a chance to speak.

Then this calm came over me. I connected with it. I let it sink in.

I realised I AM an artist. That I have always been an artist. An artist in training at least.

 

Trust, art journal, 2012

 

Looking back, I can clearly see how every little thing I have experienced in life, whether it looked art related or not, led me here. That every little thing I have experienced has defined my art. That every little thing I have experienced defines how and what I want to do with my art in the future.

And you know what?

Not only did someone like my new work status (thanks Paty!), but as soon as I openly admitted being an artist, the Universe rose up to meet me, placing all kinds of bold new dreams and adventures in my lap. Like wanting to teach art journaling online in the future, and have my own online art business. Which takes me completely out of my comfort zone (what the heck do I know about video editing, or running a small business???).

But even though my legs threathen to buckle underneath me, I carry on, because I realise there is no other way than forward.

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" - Anais Nin


                                                            ***

This post is part of a brave blogging challenge arranged by Liv Lane for the students of her e-course How To Build A Blog You Truly Love. 

My Britain

 

 

As the UK celebrated the Diamond Jubilee of Queen Elizabeth II with a 4 day weekend,

I was overwhelmed with love for this adopted country of mine.

I may not have been born here,

but this country, with its amazing energy, welcomed me in with open arms

when I was barely 19.

It let me grow and develop into the person I needed to be,

not the one my birth country thought I should be.

 

It opened my senses,

taught me to trust my instincts, live bravely,

and let my hair down.

 

It is home.

 

Thank you! Love you always! xx

 

 

366 photos: day 142- 148 (and blogoversary news)

 

Hey,

Can you believe it's Monday again?! The weeks seem to rush past. Last week was a great one though. I started two new workshops, Your Living Canvas with Christy Tomlinson and How to Build a Blog You Truly Love with Liv Lane. They're both wonderful and compliment each other really well. And on top of that... the sun came out! Yippee!

So, this is the week that was in pictures...

 

Monday: Ahhh! Line- dried clothes :)

 

Tuesday: Bliss!

 

Wednesday: Aoife was home sick, but had perked up enough by the afternoon to ask for a game or two of hide-and-seek.

 

Thursday: BFFs. Love these girls :)

 

Friday: Doing an exercise for Liv's course that really got me thinking.

 

Saturday: A day in the park, complete with picnic lunch. Wonderful day!

 

Sunday: Sunday dinner at Alan's cousin's. As usual, the kids made a bee-line for the piano the moment they arrived.

End of 21.

But get this, today is Life As We Know It's 1st blogoversary! What a fun year it's been! I have loved sharing everyday life and art with you over the past year. Thank you so much for supporting me! And with Liv's help, I'm hoping to make year 2 and beyond even better.

I will hold a giveaway in a couple of weeks to say thank you, combining it with another big celebration in my life. In the meantime, why don't you head on over to facebook and check out my new page! You should now be able to see a button at the top of right hand column of the blog too. Let me know if you have any problems.

See you soon!

 

how I {don't} fit it all in, part 3

 

This is the third part of a blog post on how I don't fit it all in. The first one can be found here. The second here.

    ***

Ha ha! So I set out to write a post on how I try to fit art and blogging into my daily life... and both kids got sick and needed my full attention, leaving me no time to blog or art!

Which reminded me I forgot one important tip in part 2... go with the flow! :/

Ain't life fun?!?!

 

Anyway, here goes:

 

Don't you just love how shiny and new that journal looks in this photo from last year. It's not so clean now, that's for sure!

 

Art (journaling)

 

Keep the journal out all day:

When Kirby was newborn and I could only fit in a minute or two to myself all day, I kept the journal open on the breakfast bar at all times, so I didn't have to waste time taking it out, opening it up to the right page, or what have you. Then when I had a minute, even if it was just waiting for the kettle to boil, I could add a little something to the page. It made me feel like I still had some me-time, even though I was knee-deep in caring for a newborn.

Kirby is (thankfully) a much better sleeper now, but I still keep my journal open all day when I'm working on a page. It's ready to go whenever I am.

If you have somewhere safe to leave your art out so you can add to it during the day, I highly recommend it.

 

Keep an art supply kit:

If you've been around a while you know I have worked from a shoe box full of supplies at the kitchen breakfast bar since before Kirby was born, and just change out the contents when I get bored of them or use them up.

I love having an art kit because it means I have everything ready to go, and it challenges me to make the most of whatever is in it. It can be as big or as small as you want/ need.

I recently admitted to myself (and to Alan, who has had to put up with the mess for the past couple of years) that the shoe box format isn't working (for us). It's too big and bulky, not sturdy enough, and far too tempting for little fingers. It has to sit out on the breakfast bar, so the breakfast bar is never tidy. It's driving us both crazy. So I am going back to the drawing board. I still want and need a kit, but it has to fit my needs better. I was thinking of converting Alan's old briefcase, but I'd have the same problem with storage, so I'm now thinking I might just hang a tote on the back of the door. You can't see it when you come into the kitchen, but it is still within easy reach.

I'll do a separate post on what I keep in my kit(s) at some point .

 

Use supplies suitable to the circumstances:

When Kirby was little, he would only sleep on me (in a carrier/ sling, or in my arms), see picture in the first fitting it all in post, so I pretty much only used WS crayons, coloured pencils, and glue sticks for a while, because I didn't want to risk touching him when my hands were messy.

Now he's older I still leave messy stuff till he's asleep, and do cleaner stuff (like sketching) when he's around. I fit in a lot more art in my day that way.

 

Make art with the kids:

Okay, so not all kids are as obsessed with drawing and painting as Aoife, but in my experience as a parent, and former nanny and au pair, most kids like it well enough that you get a few minutes to work on something while they're working on their own little masterpiece.

 

 

Blogging:

 

Keep notes:

As you know, I try not to go on the computer when the kids are around, but I often think of ideas for blogging when it is off, so I write the ideas down in my catch-all journal and come back to them later. If I have an idea when I'm out and about, I either write it in my phone or use the voice recording app that came with it to keep them safe until I get time on the computer. When I have computer time, I'm ready to go.

 

To-do lists:

Ha! I know some of you are cringing right now, but you know I love them. I use them for everything, including blogging.

 

Download/ edit photos often:

I  download the photos from the point-and-shoot and the dslr pretty much every day. I only do the phone pictures once a week, because I don't use them on the blog as often. I try to edit as I go, so I don't have a massive job on my hands later, but often use nights when Alan is out to catch up. That way, when I need a photo for a post I just need to resize it and sharpen it.

 

Speed it up:

I'm terrible at this, but am trying to get better. Don't worry over every word and sentence, just write. Then leave it, if you can, for a bit before coming back to edit before posting. Much quicker, and much more natural. But, ahem, I'm still getting to grips with that one myself. Instead of just writing, I tie myself in knots wondering if I'm using the "right" words or if I'm using Swedish grammar instead of English grammar (yes, after 20 years in the UK, I still get confused!) , until I have completely over-edited the post. Working on it, folks! Working on it!

 

So that's just some quick pointers to how I try to fit in some art and blog time into my days. Hope they've been of some help to someone. If you have any other tips that I have missed, please write them in the comments. I'm always looking for new ways.

how I {don't} fit it all in, part 2

 

This is the second part of a blog post on how I don't fit it all in. The first one can be found here.

***

Hello my dears!

Me again!

I had so many thought on that last post I decided to divide it into three parts. It's something I'm constantly working on.

 

 

Knowing you need some me-time each day and actually having it are completely different things. So I've been thinking a lot about what I do, or have done, to make it easier to fit it into my life. First some general ideas (from the viewpoint of a stay at home mum, cos that's what I am, but hopefully they are broad enough to help anyone):

 

Accept the season you're in

This may sound silly, and obvious, but I keep coming across people who have wanted kids for years, and love their kids to bits, yet think they can still live it up like they don't have them. Do it all. Have it all. Now!

It may work for a little while, but I don't think anyone can keep that up in the long run.

And comparing yourself to someone who seems to fit it all in at once will drive you crazy. I know. I've been there.

The first few years are intense. You sometimes feel like you are running around in circles all day and have nothing to show from it.

One of the best things I did for myself after having kids was to fully accept the season I'm in. Knowing that I can't do it all, I have managed to focus on what really matters to me right now, and happily put other things on hold for a while.

For a while. Not forever. For a while.

 

Simplify

Yes, that old chestnut!

But it really is true. The simpler you make your life, the more time you have left over for "the fun stuff", whether that's playing with your kids or taking some much needed me-time when the baby naps.

 

Know your limits

I have lived with a bad back for years. If I overdo it, I'm out of action for days, sometimes weeks, on end.  So I need to take time out each day.

I once asked a friend how she keeps her house so immaculate at all times. She said she does a lot of stuff at night after the kids have gone to bed. My gut reaction was a big, fat "NOOO!!!". What works really well for her is my personal idea of hell.

Work out your limits.

Knowing my limits has helped me work better in the time that I've got. Which leads me onto:

 

Don't waste time

What's your time-suck? Mine is the computer. When I go on the computer I lose hours at a time. So I try to keep it off when the kids are around. Because that's our time together. Or if I want to paint. Because that's my time to paint. And so on.

I don't trust myself. Sad, but true. And it has actually made me a lot more focused.

 

You can fit more into a short space of time than you think you can.

I used to think I couldn't do anything unless I had a huge block of time at my disposal. Then I had kids!

Realising I could get a lot of things done with just the odd minute here and the odd minute there at my disposal was a huge revelation. They don't get finished in one sitting, but they get finished. And perhaps even more importantly; they get started!

 

Right. That's just some general stuff that has helped me find some time for myself during the day. I'll be back next week with more practical ideas for arting and blogging.

Have a good weekend my friends!

 

how I {don't} fit it all in

 

Let's chat.

It's been a while since I last sat down with you and had a proper chat, not just rushed through here like a whirling dervish.

So I have had a few questions lately on how I fit it all in; art, blogging, mindful parenting, doing up our home, housework, reading...

It cracks me up!

I can't believe you are asking ME how I do it. I'm hanging on by a thread most of the time, and you're asking me?!

Seriously?! Have you seen the state of my house?!

Besides, I don't ever want to give the impression that I do fit it all in, because I don't. I'm sorry if it seems that way. I wouldn't want to put that kind of pressure on anyone.

 

 

 

I'm a mum. I spend most of my days cooking, cleaning, wiping snotty noses and dirty bums, kissing owies, picking up and dropping off, playing peekaboo, and overseeing homework...

Just like most other stay at home mums with young kids.

And that's okay. Because that's the season I'm in.

There are tons of things I'd like to do, but have put on hold for now.

And that's okay. Because that's the season I'm in.

 

 

That said, I think it's really important to do something for yourself every day too, or you'll burn out. Nobody can do a job 24/7 for years on end without a break, no matter how much they love it. That includes being a mother.

Taking a break helps me be a better, more patient mum.

So when Kirby goes down for his nap, I quickly pick up and put away his toys, then sit down to blog, do some art, or read. And when the kids go to bed at night, I chill out with Alan, then head up to bed to read for a bit. We rarely do any kind of work at night (I do the grocery shop online one night, he irons one night).

Yes, that means the house is often a lot messier than I would have liked it to be, but I am a much nicer and happier person to be around!

And believe me, that counts for something!

 

I have loads more to say on this but it's already getting lengthy, so I think I'll split it into two or three posts. I'll be back with part two on Friday.

Till then, my friends!

 

366 photos: day 128-134

 

Hello!

Hope you had a good week!

Sorry about disappearing on you last week, but I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by life, so had to take some time out to rest and sort out some things.

 

Monday: A bank holiday over here (for May Day). The kids played school, which basically involved Aoife walking Kirby all over the house, taking him to classes, Irish dancing and assembly. Kirby happily followed his big sis everywhere she went (as long as he could hold on to the school bag).

 

Tuesday: I was a bit late ordering my copy of the first Featuring magazine, but finally got it and happily sank into the sofa with a cuppa to read it as soon as Kirby went down for his nap. Good times!

 

Wednesday: Wrapping presents for 3 nieces and nephews whose birthdays are coming up soon.

 

Thursday: Gathering (copies of) special pictures and papers for a new art project.

 

Friday: Having my hair done...and feeling a tad self-conscious about taking a photo of myself in public, so trying to make it look like I am texting someone lol.

 

Saturday: Playtime :)

 

Sunday: Tickle me, mummy! Tickle me!

 

And that's the end of week 19! Back in a couple of days with a post on how I don't fit it all in.

 

Spread Your Wings {art journal}

 

 

I am at a crossroads. One road leading back into the safety of the known, the other in a scary new world of the unknown.

Looking back I can connect all the dots that led me here, yet it seems sudden and has caught me completely by surprise.

It is totally right for me, I know that, but I'm scared. I don't feel ready. But the Universe keeps throwing hints at me, saying "It's your time. Do it! Do it!". 

And who am I to mess with the Universe?

So I am slowly taking the first few steps into the unknown, shaky legs nearly buckling underneath me and my heart beating so fast I'm beginning to think it is going to jump right out of my body. But I keep going.

I keep going!

 

366 photos: day 107- 113

 

Hello! Happy Monday!

 

Monday: On a particularly playful morning, Aoife asked for a picture of the three of us together. I, of course, jumped at the chance. With only minutes to spare before we had to leave for school we cuddled up on the sofa and snapped away.

 

Tuesday: Yay! The transfer worked! For once! My persistance paid off!

 

Wednesday: Do you see it? Do you see the heart? I love hearts and look out for them everywhere. When I can, I snap a picture. My hope is to create a photo book when I have enough.

 

Thursday: My poor deprived child complained about getting 3 cooked meals a day. She wanted sandwiches. So we had a packed lunch dinner.

 

Friday: When Kirby got this elephant for his birthday, Alan and I thought it was just another noisy battery operated toy. We were wrong! This rocking elephant has magical powers. He can calm a fidgety baby in seconds and turn a frown upside down. We love him!

 

Saturday: Muddy fun up at the rugby club (and this is the clean version!)

 

Sunday: I finally got to spend some time in the attic to sort and put away the clothes the kids have outgrown lately, and bring down some new ones. Now we just need to decide what comes next...

 

And that's the end of week 16!

This week looks to be as rainy as the last, so no doubt there will be plenty of reading, pottering, and indoor fun ahead.

 

A sick house

 

Aoife is recovering from a cold. Kirby and I have flu-like colds. Kirby has a middle ear infection. I've had virtually no sleep since Thursday.

I am shattered.

So I hope you'll understand the lack of posts at the end of last week, and why I've decided to take this week off to look after the kiddos, recover and refresh.

Hope your Easter was better! See you soon!